First Impressions!

First impressions last long we all know, but should they?

It was her first day on the job. She was awfully excited but had woken up so late she could not eat breakfast or pack her lunch. Well, truth be told, she had been exhausted playing with her 15 month old child the night before perhaps in a bid to quell the feelings of guilt she was trying not to feel.

She took a last lingering look in the fridge trying to see if perhaps a possible lunch idea would form from the Ketchup, Milk and Fruits she had in there. If only her grocery delivery had arrived yesterday as planned she sighed as she slammed the fridge door and donned her coat. She would source out something she thought as she said her goodbye to the childminder and kissed her little boy even as her stomach growled.

Hunger pangs still clawed at her inside 20minutes later when she walked into the new Company that would be her workplace from now. She was introduced to her team. They all slapped on bright smiles but she noticed the smiles did not quite reach their eyes.

Her induction took a full hour but then she got a good tour of the building. So good in fact that she made her way back to the canteen a short while later to see if she could grab a bite. Glad that there was a tuna and sweetcorn sandwich she hurriedly claimed it but, alas, scouting through her handbag revealed she had only had a few pennies. Realising she brought the wrong bag, she quietly walked away from the canteen with tears stinging her eyes.

Back in their open-plan office, she decided to focus on her work for the day. Just at that time, one of the ladies in her team (Lucy) came over and said ' uhm skiving already?' She had no quick retort that could match that so she gave a quarter of a smile.

The next few hours went by quickly and it was soon lunch time. She decided to check on the childminder and was speaking to her on her cell phone when her team all stood up to go for lunch. Lucy gave her a quizzical look that asked, 'aren't you coming?' to which she shook her head.

Lucy smirked back at her, passing a crystal clear message to her, 'she had just crossed a line' but short of humiliating herself and asking them to loan her a fiver, there was no way she could go and have lunch with them. Besides she never had lunch buddies at work, she preferred to sit alone and enjoy a quiet lunch thereby avoiding the gossip that characterised team lunches.

An hour later, when her team returned, they each asked her if she had worked through lunch. When she responded affirmatively, they chorused 'uuhhh' and Lucy gave her daggers. Evidently, she just stepped further away from the accepted and liked line.

2 years into this job, her team would now like and value her contribution but not before telling her how much they loathed her on that first day and how they had decided to 'show' her during that lunch she opted out of; their first impression of her being that she was a 'skiving, snobbish, working through lunch type' when in fact she was just a 'hungry, cashless, trying to get through the day type'.

So I ask again, should first impressions last long? Or should we simply try to get an accurate first impression?

* To 'skive' is British slang for the practice of avoiding responsibilities (particularly work or school) because you want to do something more fun or just don’t want to do what you should be doing.

Did you know?

That according to some research carried out a few years ago in US and UK:

• 73% percent of all books in libraries are never checked out.
• The average American reads only eight hours every week.
• 40% of Britons never read books only newspapers
• The average American annually spends 10 times more on what he puts on his head than what he puts into his head.

I wonder what such research if carried out in Nigeria, might reveal. I do know that most Nigerian homes have just about all the electrical gadgets imagineable but lack a library.

It is not all doom and gloom however, I also found this interesting information in an article by Harvey Mackay :

• If you read just one book per month for 12 straight months, you will be in the top 25 percentile of all intellectuals in the world!
• If you read five books on one subject, you are one of the world's foremost leading authorities on that subject!
• If you read just 15 minutes a day -- every day, for one year -- you can complete 20 books!

Ah - ha! Why not read a book this month? I will!

*Data for this post was from:

http://www.literacytrust.org.uk/Database/Mori.html#never and
http://www.heraldextra.com/content/view/205172/

New Year, New Job? Not unless employers call you back!

It is common knowledge that many people are unhappy with their current jobs and are seeking new ones. However, not so many manage to make that job switch.

Contrary to what some might believe, many employers do look at CVs and Cover letters and read through them. So if you fall in the job hunter category and have been at it for a while, unless you are getting interview calls, you need to pause and restrategize. These tips might help.

• Apply for the the right job - if you don't speak a word of french why are you applying for a job that requires you speak french fluently?
• Be concise - make short sensible sentences in your cover letter
• Compare, compare, compare - by this I mean compare your CV and Cover letter with others before you send them out
• Definitely give examples - so you can do x, y and z how about you cite cases and scenarios
• Eradicate errors from your CV and Cover letter (nothing shouts incompetent more than those mis-spelt words and grammatically wrong sentences so make your's error-free)

Giving back to the Giver

As I thought of what specific thing to be thankful for this week, this hymn popped back into my head as it has done every now and then since I first heard it. If you ever heard of a small blue book called ‘Songs of Praise’ (SOP) then you more than likely know the Hymn. It is number 444 in SOP.

It makes me pause and think about things I otherwise take for granted. I take a moment and think of a small creature, usually an ant and then of a big creature, an Elephant. I think about how they were made by God and marvel.

So today, I give back to Him who lays the beams of His upper chambers in the waters and walks on the wings of wind, He who laid the foundations of the earth and makes the clouds His chariot, my gratitude for creation, His numerous wonderful works and hymns that help us remember to be thankful.

Enjoy:

Shall we rekindle the flame? Part 1

As an African in the Diaspora, I get questioned a lot about when if ever I intend to return home. My answer in my first year abroad was just as soon as I completed my Masters and maybe worked for a year. That answer has since become a big question mark.

Some months ago I had a conversation with some family members where I was accused of not liking Nigeria and I vehemently defended myself. If I am to have that conversation now, perhaps my defense of myself might not be so strong.

I have become accustomed to a way of life and to things ‘working’ that what was once a fiercely burning fire to develop and improve my country is fast becoming ebbing coals. Isn’t this true of many of us? It may even be the reason why often, our elected officials hardly do anything when they assume power. The fact is, it is harder to empathize or feel something as strongly when you are physically removed from it.

By no means is this a justification of our leaders, indeed they have failed and continue to fail us on several levels. Anyone who has ever been hungry for a considerable length of time would know that at that time, you remember those who have nothing to eat on a daily basis, images of hunger stricken children who could die of starvation may even flash in your head; but the moment you have eaten to your belly’s satisfaction those reflections and other such images fade away from your memory. This is what I believe happens to our leaders. They know that there are many plagues to get rid of they just are no longer that much afflicted and so things slide.

Having said that, most of us grew up with the desire to make Nigeria a better place; some like me, even took up community development projects during the service year which earned them the State’s recognition and award. So many of us (home and abroad) love Nigeria and desire to see her fulfill her potential or at least provide her people with the basic human needs: constant supply of electricity and water, well maintained good roads and education.

Part 2 will be posted next Saturday.

One fun thing you can do this weekend @ no cost.

We can get so caught up in life that we forget to take a break from our routine activities even when it is obvious we need one. Other times when we do remember there are not many fun things we can do that do not involve spending. Well here’s one, do nothing!

What can be more fun than doing absolutely nothing? Well by nothing I mean nothing on your ‘to do’ list. Playing hookey has always been a fun thing to do hasn’t it? It is the reason people continue to skip classes in school and pull sickies at work.

So one day this weekend, how about you abandon the list and play hookey! Do any one of these things whilst you are at it:

• Stay in your pyjamas
• Don’t answer phone calls
• Eat directly from the pot
• Jump in a puddle
• Scribble with a stick on the sand.
• Have a hot-cold shower

Some of these you relished doing as children. Well, I suggest you reconnect with that child still in you. It really doesn’t matter which of these you choose to do or not do just as long as you have fun. You will feel better for it.

Who are you and where are you from?

In this age of virtual what have you and globalization, the world has shrunk and enlarged all for the same reasons. People are now meeting people from all over the world and making friends with people living in countries they have never been and may never visit. Defining ourselves and identity has never been more complex.

My first encounter with globalization if I don’t count the Indian family in my secondary school, was as a student in Leicester. I was visiting two of my classmates at one of the Halls of residence when one of them said “Wow how much more global can we get?” There we were, the Nigerian, sitting with an American (whose Dad is Polish) and a Chinese eating fried plantain with chopsticks.

I further grasped how this globalization affected people on personal levels when I would hear Asian and African looking people response in long winded sentences that began with “I am originally from…’ before they end it with “… but I was born here” when asked where they where from. Although, I also was born in UK, it never seemed right for me to make the ‘originally from’ sentence until now.

I currently live in the US and get asked a lot where I am from and I find that responding with a simple ‘Nigeria’ doesn’t suffice as people tend to assume that I had endured some sort of hardship in the process of getting here.

Besides, follow up questions often reveal that I have lived in UK and so it has become easier all round for me to say the ‘I am originally from….’ phrase. What I find amusing is the reaction I get when this information comes to light it’s almost as if right there I am transformed into a more interesting person and I get asked even more questions. That really cracks me up.

Just how complex this whole concept of identity and defining ourselves has become fazes me. I can’t help thinking what phrase my Nigerian/British/American kids will coin when they are asked these questions in the not so far future. Perhaps then acronyms will be used and they might get away with saying NBA.

Makes one wonder why there appears to be little if any shift in our mindsets as people despite the changes globalization has brought about or isn't who we are and where we are from not so much about the Nation as it is a product of our cultural and other experiences?